What is the deal with the 30(ish) year old 'guys' today...?
I am having such a difficult time understanding these guys. I feeling that they want to act like men, but to be honest they are as far away from being men as humanly possible. I am really generalising here, so don't get me wrong, not all male specimens are like this.
Of course, there are exceptions, but most guys that are in my circle of friends or acquaintances are or live the typical life of the 30(ish) year old bachelors. As I have explained in my earlier posts; girl are vicious, however; guys are just plain horrible. So before when guys wanted out of relationships, most of them being the cowards they are, turned to ghosting. This is merely a cowardly way of getting out of a relationship, or soon to be relationship, the guy would get your hopes up and then one day to the next disappear off the face of the earth. I mean my rebound after my last relationship lasted about one month, but this guy is unbelievable. I would never end up with this guy because listen: the guy is 29 years old, even if he is super kind and has a really good heart - the guy lives with his parents. I mean if that isn't a red flag I don't know what is. Anyways, this is what he did to me, from one day to another he just stopped answering. I don't really mind because I never saw him to be anything more than a rebound. But this is one example of ghosting.
The new trend, something that I have also been a victim of recently: breadcrumbing.
This is just like ghosting, just more sadistic. And the worst part, guys seem to enjoy it. I mean, as girls, I think we all like the 50 Shades of Grey trilogy. And the whole sadistic and S&M side seems like the sexiest thing in the world. Just that, breadcrumbing is sadistic in a psychological way.
The urban dictionary defines this as:
The act of sending out flirtatious, but non-committal text messages (i.e breadcrumbs') to members of the opposite sex in order to lure a sexual partner without expending much effort.
The reason why I relate this to guys in their early 30's is because this is their generation. Now, I do not want to be some kind of sexist feminist and say that men are horrible, because they aren't - well at least not all of them... Girls do this as well, lord knows I have. It is just easier, but it is evil, and having been on the receiving end of it, I think I will stop doing it and just be honest.
So, I live in Brussels, Belgium. The heart of Europe. The crowd that I am acquainted with are generally people (guys) that are well off. They know who they are and what they have, even if most of the time, it is mommy and daddy's assets, along with their own (sometimes). I think these guys are just so scared of leaving their bachelor years behind them that this is what they see as a healthy relationship, and it is really sad. I do not expect relationships to be how they were 20-odd years ago, I believe that with time, traditions and habits change. But there should be a limit on how much we are willing to change.
Even if guys that I date do this to me, and I can clearly see that this is what they are doing, when you are caught up in it it is really hard to separate yourself from the 'dream' that you create in your mind and the reality in which we live. The numerous of times that this happens, and I can honestly say that I have a couple of guys on my phone that I still have this relationship to. I really do believe that with all the technology and all the possibilities that we have in front of us today makes it dating so much harder. I mean if you take Instagram as an example, guys are constantly on there liking pictures and commenting and seeing what else is out there. Keeping "in-touch" has never been easier, so of course - why should guys stay with one girl when he can string three or four along...?
Guys are so easy to read, and girls are so easily fooled. Guys just have to say a few phrases to get girls under their "spell", and once under that "spell" they know that the girls are willing to do anything. I have a really funny story about a guy who did this to me, but I am not really at the stage to write about it (it will be posted soon).
I started this blog to show the world, or who ever is willing to read and listen, who I am, and with that I have to tell my stories.
Maybe girls who get breadcrumbed are too pushy? I know I can be. As I explained in earlier posts: I like to define relationships, and maybe this is why this happened(s) to me. We all like to have people caring for us, and it might be sad to admit, but I think that this is how future relationships will start - or just how they are, of course until you find your soulmate (if you believe in that)... I think that in today's society; we are so self obsessed and we focus so much on ourselves that we just need to know that there is one person that will be there for us, no matter how badly we treat them. I am speaking in general, because I am not like this at all. I NEED someone who is there for me constantly, stringing someone along is really not my cup of tea.
Breadcrumbing has taken 2017 by storm on all social media. It is being mentioned everywhere. And maybe this is just how dating and relationship work in 2017.
Be kind guys.